To see if you fall into the “defensive” category, I’ve developed a small quiz.
Please answer the following ten questions.
1. Do you take it personally when someone criticizes you?
2. Do you feel a greater sense of personal worth when somebody compliments you?
3. Do you often feel like you are in competition with the people you are talking to?
4. Do you have a hard time owning your flaws when others acknowledge them?
5. Are you expecting others to be offensive before they even act?
6. Do you get fired up when people rub you the wrong way?
7. Are you sometimes too distracted by a person’s words and body language to hear the message in what they’re saying?
8. Do you react strongly to offensive people?
9. Do you typically see your bad interactions with people as being their fault, rather than your own?
10. Do you feel it is your job to make others fully appreciate you?
Take a look at your results. If you answered “yes” to three or more of these questions, you are probably a more defensive person. And if you respond negatively to hearing that you’re a defensive person, then the chances are even greater that yes, you indeed are a defensive person.
They always say the first step toward recovery is admitting that you have a problem. So, if you are a defensive person, then I want you to pause for a moment and say it out loud. Say; “I have a problem with defensiveness. With this problem, I am doing great harm to my relationships”. From there, you can begin to move forward and make real changes.
Defensiveness robs us of a better life. It keeps us from having better positions at work, better relationships at home, better friendships, better communication, and even, the chance to be made better by valuable constructive criticism. Isn’t it time we stop doing this?
Welcome to 10 ways to make sure you never stop being defensive. In this book, we will tell you all about the ten rules to follow if your goal is to stay defensive forever. These rules, of course, are rules that you should break, being that your goal probably is not to stay defensive forever, but to improve and experience a healthier world.
The ten rules are:
1. Personalize Matters That Aren’t Personal.
2. Make All Matters Into Matters Of Worthiness.
3. Look For Offenses In Everything.
4. Assume To Know What Others Are Thinking.
5. Dodge The Blame.
6. Always Speak And Act Before Thinking.
7. Do Not Be Self Aware.
8. Do Not Hear The Message Behind The Words.
9. Always Be Right.
10. Never Take Any Crap From Anyone.
If you’d like a free copy of this book, click HERE.