And what you can do to save it!!!
John Gottman, relationships expert and author of many relationships books, such as “The Relationship Cure” and “Why Marriages Succeed Or Fail”, says that there are four horsemen of the relationship apocalypse. They are:
This last one, is one of the most common. It’s one that seems to sneak in under our radars. When someone criticizes us, we don’t realize we’re being defensive by tossing up all of our innocence-proving statements, like “it doesn’t matter anyway” or “why do you care so much? Quit nit-picking. Nobody’s perfect”. Who would guess that this seemingly-harmless trait could be responsible for so many relational failures? But it is.
Deep inside, our defensive behavior usually points to some fears that we carry, of being abandoned, experiencing rejection, or being injured. We are guarding ourselves “defensively”, because some baggage that we carry has taught us to.
I have written a book about learning to overcome defensiveness. Normally $3.95, I would like to give you this audiobook for FREE. That’s right. You pay nothing. If you’re interested, please join my mailing list. You can start by clicking the link below: